Twinkies!
by Nissiyon Took
Summary: Elladan and Elrohir are twins. When one wants to skip school, can the other step in to save his butt and fool everyone? HERENYA BRANDYBUCK HELPED!
1. The bomb is dropped

APC: Hey everybody! This is just a funny little something I came up with! Well, Herenya Brandybuck helped with some of the ideas, and of course, the pre-reading!

I think it is really entertaining! Hope ya'll do to!

Disclaimer: Oh yeah, I'm so totally Tolkien, you know it…UGH I hate disclaimers. It's OBVIOUS I'm not Tolkien, and I can't own any of his stuff, I mean c'mon! He's dead! So what's the freaking point?!

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"Elledan! Hey Elledan! Where are you?"

"In the kitchen!"

Elrohir, son of Elrond Half-Elven, entered the kitchen where his twin brother Elledan was spreading ground up peanuts on two pieces of _lembas _bread. Both boys were completely identical. They each had brilliant blue eyes, a slender frame, tan skin, and short, wildly spiky black hair (of which _no one _seemed to approve).

"Hey make me one of those!"

"No way, do it yourself, lazy!" Elledan retorted.

"Oh shut up," muttered Elrohir. "Hey…can you uh…do something for me?"

"I'm _not _making you a sandwich!"

"I don't want a bloody sandwich! No, I want to ask you a favor."

"Well, depends on what it is," replied Elledan, munching on his peanut butter sandwich.

"Alright, as you know, I'm dating Ireth-"

Elledan choked violently, spitting out pieces of bread and peanut butter. "You're _what?!_"

"Ireth! You know-"

"Yeah I KNOW who Ireth is!" Elledan said in disbelief. "You're _dating _her?! Man, no fair! She is _so _hot!"

"Yes I know," Elrohir said gloatingly. "Anyway, she's going to Mirkwood in two days to stay with a friend. She's going to be gone for a whole month, and I can't see her tomorrow because I promised Dad that I'd help him mend the stables. So tonight is the last night I can see her."

"But you have class tonight."

"That's where you come in, Elledan!" Elrohir said slyly. Elledan had an inkling of what was brewing in his brother's mind, but he kept silent so Elrohir continued. "Well, if you go in my place to class tonight, I could go out with Ireth!"

Elledan had expected this, but he was shocked nonetheless. "You want ME to take your place at your construction class tonight?! What if they ask me a question? I don't know anything ABOUT construction! Then they'll find out it's not you, and we'll BOTH be flayed alive! Besides, we have finals next week! You can't skip!"

"C'mon, Elledan! It's just one night! If they ask you a question, just say you forgot! That's what I always say!"

"_Are you just totally nuts?!_"

"You're the freaky psych-major! You tell me!" shouted Elrohir.

"C'mon man! I've got my own class tonight!"

"When? Is it before mine?"

"Yeah…"

"Well, you can do yours, then go to mine!"

Elledan was exasperated. "What's Dad going to say when I don't come home?!"

"I don't know, tell him you're going somewhere after class!"

"There is no way I'm doing this."

"Hey…"

A strange gleam suddenly shone in Elrohir's eyes.

"You remember than time you accidentally burnt Arwen's favorite dress down to a pile cinders?" he asked sleekly. "And remember how I said took the blame, saying it was _my _fault?"

Elledan hung his head. He knew where this was leading.

"And remember," continued Elrohir, "how you said if I ever needed something, you would help in payment of your debt?"

"OK! OK!" cried Elledan. "Fine, I'll take your place! Just shut up already!"

Elrohir smiled his most mischievous smile. "Thanks bro, you're the best."

Having beaten his brother into submission with his oh-so-persuasive speech, Elrohir skipped out the kitchen whistling happily.

Elledan gazed at his half eaten sandwich.

"Have you ever seen a plan where so much could go wrong?" he asked it before cramming the rest into his mouth.

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APC: Yeah, I know it's short, but I thought this was a good place to end it! More will come! Please R&R!


	2. The bomb explodes

APC: Ok! Here's chapter two!

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"Alright class, remember that finals are next week! Be sure to study!"

With a loud shuffling of paper and feet, Elledan's psychology class packed up and headed out the door, but before he could squeeze through the door, an elven girl stopped him.

"Oh-no," moaned Elledan under his breath. "Hey uh…oh darn, what's her name…Tamuríl?"

"Hi there Elledan!" chirped the blond haired girl. "Hey hey, guess what?"

Elledan sighed. "What?"

"I'm allowed to go on dates now!"

"Fabulous."

"I know isn't it cool? I wanted to know if maybe you and I could – hey, where did you get that scar?"

"I got into a fight ok? I've got to go!" he snapped irritably. Before the determined flirt opened her mouth again, he had pushed his way through the door and left the building.

"Ok…Elrohir's class is-" He looked at a map he had pulled from his pocket – "across…campus…."

Elledan froze. Tamuríl's words rang in his ears. _Hey, where did you get that scar? _

"Oh man! I totally forgot!"

If Elledan hadn't have been imitating his brother, this fact wouldn't have bothered him. He had gotten into a fight with his brother a while ago and got punched in the eye. The blow had broken the skin, and he now had a very visible white scar the circled halfway across the cheekbone beneath his left eye. But this scar was the one way people could tell the twin brothers apart.

Elledan stood for a moment in a panic. He tugged at his pointed ear, a sign of serious thinking. If he could only hide the scar…

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"Hey Arwen! Guess what! Your boyfriend is here!"

Footsteps thudded rapidly down the stairs. Elledan's black haired, blue-eyed sister rushed past him, stopped suddenly, and asked frantically, "Do I look alright?!"

Before Elledan could even answer, Arwen had disappeared from sight. Shaking his head, the elf ran up the stairs and made his way to Arwen's room.

"I haven't been in her room in a long time. At least two ye-…._woah_…"

Elledan had opened the bedroom door and the sight left him speechless. It was as if a deluge of pink had been unleashed on the walls, the bed, the ceiling, and the carpet. The blankets were pink, the pillows were pink, and even the lacy curtain's were the same lurid pink. Stuffed animals littered the floor. Pictures and posters of a ruggedly handsome man were plastered on every inch of the walls.

Elledan walked dazedly towards a chest of drawers with a messy vanity. Every scrap of paper lying around had 'I love Aragorn' scribbled on them.

"Holy…cheese…" breathed Elledan in wonder. "She sure has gotten sickeningly cutesy since she was a kid…"

Trying to keep from being sick from all the pink, Elledan rummaged through the pile of makeup scattered around the vanity until he found a stick of tan concealer. He looked at it with disdain.

"Man, I can't believe I'm doing this…" he muttered as he leaned forward to look in the mirror and spread the concealer over his scar. He could not deny the effectiveness of it, but just the idea of wearing makeup was simply degrading.

"_ELLEDAN, YOU LYING LITTLE SNOTRAG!"_

"Uh-oh!"

Elledan rushed out the door and to his own room as Arwen stormed up the stairs. Locking his own door, he unlatched his window and climbed onto a tree limb and clambered down. As he hustled down the road, his stomach suddenly turned icy: for to his utter horror, his father was walking towards him.

"Elrohir!" called Elrond. "Have you seen your brother? He didn't come home from class."

Elledan began sweating profusely. "Uh, I think uh, he went out with some friends."

"That boy! You'd think he would tell me…ah, well. You hurry along to class. Study hard!"

And move fast was what Elledan did. His feet moved more rapidly than they ever had in his whole life. Once he had reached the campus, Elledan stopped for a moment to catch his breath then entered the building. He had no trouble finding Elrohir's construction class. He opened the door slowly and saw that every other student had taken their seat.

"Come in Elrohir."

Elledan gulped and took his seat. The professor paused in his lecture and turned towards Elledan.

"Would you mind explaining why you were late, Elrohir?"

"I uh…I wasn't feeling well so a laid down to rest and…I guess I slept too long," lied Elledan, knowing it probably sounded lame. "I won't do it again."

"I'll excuse you for now, Elrohir. And I'll hold you to your word."

The professor turned back the blackboard where he was drawing a diagram of how to build a sturdy storm shelter. It made no sense to Elledan; there were too many figures to keep track of. He attempted to listen, but his incomprehension caused his mind to become bored. He looked at the mechanical clock hanging on the wall. Thirty minutes and no questions. What luck! Then suddenly…

"Elrohir!"

Elledan jumped in guilty shock.

"Using the diagram, calculate the weight of the amount of wood needed to build a fence to circumnavigate this stable."

Elledan felt the color drain from his face. With a shaking hand, he picked up his quill and began scribbling totally irrelevant numbers on a scrap piece of paper.

"Uh…it's uh…three hundred seventy-two and a half pounds?" he asked lamely, his ears burning almost painfully.

"Close! The answer is three hundred sixty-nine and a quarter. Good calculating, Elrohir."

Elledan held back his sigh of relief. That was too close. He wouldn't get that lucky again, and he knew it. The rest of the class passed without incident. As he was packing up, who walked up to him but Tamuríl!

"Ah! Don't I get enough of you during psychology?!" he breathed.

"Hiya, Elrohir! Hey, I heard you were dating Ireth! That's cool! And you know what?"

"You can date now!" Elledan moaned without thinking.

"How did you know!"

"Uh…" Bad move! "Elledan told me before I left…"

"He talked about me?" breathed Tamuríl, her big blue eyes sparkling in glee. "Ohhh what else did he say?"

"Oh geez…" though Elledan. Then he replied, "Well uh…"

"Does he ever say I'm pretty?"

Elledan didn't know what to do. If he said yes, she would cling to him tighter than spider webs before, during, and after psychology class. If he told her no, he'd catch the brunt her whining before, during, and after psychology class.

It was darned if you, darned if you don't.

"Well, uh, he never really said if you were pretty…but uh…he said that uh…you were really good in psych class!"

"Really…" she moaned, obviously pleased. Just then an elven guy passing Elledan hollered, "Hey man, surprise!"

And a deluge of water hit Elledan straight in the face. Sputtering, he wiped the water from his face. "What was that for?"

"It's an early birthday present man!" laughed the guy, clapping Elledan on the back. But he suddenly stopped. "Hey man…where'd the scar come from?!"

Elledan stared at him horrorstruck. Dropping his load of books, Elledan sped out the door away from the cries of "Hey that was Elledan!"

"Oh man…I…am…so-"

He stopped in mid sentence.

"Dead."

Standing angrily in front of him was his father…gripping a thoroughly disgruntled Elrohir by the ear.

"Uh…hey Dad…"

"Cut it, Elledan," snapped Elrond. "The moment I walked in the door, I saw your brother edging up the stairs. I knew it couldn't have been him, because I had just _seen _him walking to class. Or so I thought. And your sister here told me you were at the house just _moments _before I saw you on the road. She also told me she hadn't seen Elrohir in quite a while."

Elledan and Elrohir stared at Arwen who was hiding behind her father. But entirely too close to Elrohir. He broke free of his father's grasp and lunged shouting at his sister. Screaming, she hiked up her skirts and took off running, Elrohir chasing her, and Elrond chasing Elrohir.

Elledan looked up at the sky, shook his head, and smiled.

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APC: That's it! Hope ya'll had as much fun reading it as I did writing it!


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